Some days

You know how some days you are happily cruising along and looking forward to the rest of the day and the rest of the weekend and then...BLAM! Blindsided by something totally unexpected. Well, here I sit, blind sided and unable to do the job that I should be doing at this moment. Talk about blam!

To fill you in on the history, before I tell you my blam moment - Last night my sister called me to tell me that Mom was having an MS relapse. She has a few tell tale signs and one of them is this very far away look in her eyes. We call it the 'lights are on but no one is home look'. It's a very haunting and very hated look in our family, because we know what that means. And at this point, what goes through our minds (at least mine and my sister's) is 'what's left for her to lose?' Each relapse means she loses some thing - the ability to walk without assistance, the ability to walk at all, the ability to feed herself, and on and on. Only now, there really isn't much left for her to lose. So, all we can do in these situations is wait it out and see and pray. Which is what we all did/are doing.

Now to my blam moment.

I just got a call from Dad. They are admitting Mom into the hospital. Turns out she's (also) got a raging infection somewhere. All our money is on another bladder infection, but the doctor doesn't know for sure where yet. They want to admit her to get the infection under control and also get her re hydrated.

So now, my brain, heart and emotions are spinning. Doing the dance that I do because I live 400 miles from 'home'. "Should I go home", "should I wait", "why can't I be there just for moral support", "why did we choose to live here", "why didn't we move back", "should we move back", "but I love my life here", "last time Mom had a really nasty bladder infection her system turned septic but she was lots stronger then, what would happen now" and on and on and on.

I don't know much other than what I've shared here. I'm asking you to pray for Mom and pray for Dad. The ambulance came to pick Mom up while I was talking to Dad about 30 minutes ago, so as soon as they get settled in the hospital and I hear back from him, I'll update. As for now, I suppose the girls and I will stay put until we get more information.

Thank you for the prayers.